Conflicts at work: 5 tips for peaceful interaction with colleagues
Conflicts in the workplace are not uncommon. After all, different characters and points of view meet here every day. In particular, different expectations regarding the organization of work, poor communication and the handling of stress often cause problems. Even small misunderstandings can escalate.
Teasing, jokes behind colleagues' backs, or a frustrated employee who takes the wrong tone: "All of this creates stress and is exhausting. Such conflicts not only distract from the actual tasks, but in the long run have a negative effect on the atmosphere in the entire team," knows communications expert and conflict manager Robert Häckl of the Executive Mediation Ltd. in Königstein im Taunus (Germany). To prevent conflicts in the workplace from becoming a habit and escalating, each individual can make a contribution to harmonious coexistence.
Tip 1 - Stay objective
Regardless of whether a colleague forgets to forward a customer's telephone message, talks too loudly in an open-plan office, or disagrees on content, the potential for conflict in the workplace is great. "One word can quickly follow another," knows Robert Häckl. Often, there is even a certain automatism of attack, defense and counterattack, which in the worst case degenerates into a tangible war of words. "This pattern must be broken," explains the expert. The decisive factor here is to remain objective and take speed out of the conversation. "This works very well if all parties take a moment, catch their breath and collect themselves," adds Robert Häckl. In particularly heated situations, the expert also advises retreating for a few minutes, either into the fresh air or to another place of retreat.
Tip 2 - Watch your language!
"When it comes to finding constructive solutions, the way in which certain problems are discussed is of central importance," explains Robert Häckl. Instead of attacking the others and taking a confrontational course directly in terms of language, the actual problem should be brought closer to the counterpart. It does not help to clarify a problem to accuse those involved of scheming malice, for example. "It is better to describe your own perception of the situation with I-messages," advises Robert Häckl. The situation is defused when one talks about one's own perception, one's own feelings and one's personal understanding of a situation. In this way, no one is embarrassed by having to defend themselves. Both sides are thus enabled to find a solution to the problem.
Tip 3 - What is the other person's position?
A conflict always involves at least two parties. "Therefore, each of the parties involved must be prepared to find a solution. This also includes accommodating the other party," knows Robert Häckl. This already starts with putting oneself in the other person's position and realizing how one's own messages might be understood in the heat of the moment. This helps to better understand the actual causes of the conflict and to resolve it.
Tip 4 - What is the worst that can happen?
If all parties involved insist on their point of view, it is hardly possible to reach a reconciliation. Therefore, the expert recommends visualizing the effects of the dispute for the next weeks and months, thus creating the readiness for a compromise. "Even if a compromise does not fully satisfy the individual interests of both parties, it is usually better than prolonged disputes," the expert adds.
Tip 5 - On neutral terrain
If tensions have already become entrenched, tact and conflict competence are required. Those who do not have their own specialists in this area can find help from external consultants and mediators. As neutral third parties, these experts provide targeted impulses that take into account both the corporate culture and the individuality of the employees. With their support, all those involved learn to recognize the conflict as such and to improve and resolve tense situations.
